| Wednesday, July 30, 2008 |
GOD!
ive been pleasing people around me too much which can reali suck. im aint a clown to do that. ur angry and i must like sit down and clown around with u? oh please u got the wrong person i guess...my dad has been complaining that ive changed in my character and that i dun seem interested in any thing! he says ive become more cunninG!! omg! daddy!its not anything like that...its just that:when im alone: i think about too many stuff and my face will look constipatedwhen im tired: i wun talk much just sit down and look blur at everythingwhen im angry: wun utter anything...i will look angry obviously!and anyone who comes near me will get nice vocabulary lesson from me!when im stonin: i will end up smiling to myself!haha all these seem retarded but yeah! and i dun EMO! omg no no no! and im not a EMO queen oh please! i just love dark things! i love to be in dark areas and i love NIGHTS alot!wohoo!anyway yah!and these past few days i just dun feel like talkin much except for people who call me or come and talk to me..even i wanna call someone i will think twice! i seem so dull these days..mainly thinking about my results and some other "stuff"i just dun wanna be like this..i wanna be the old saranya w/o any problems and carefree..a family oriented gal who is so jovial and cheers people around her..but now..i just make myself so aloof from everything...results are comin in no less than 2 weeks and i dunnoe wat is the outcome..my sis just got her degree results and she passed and now all the pressure is gonna be on me! i have my last 3 papers of my CAT and next year i wanna move on to ACCA and finish it soon! oh god save me..and i dun seem to be praying properly. usualli i willl pray b4 sleeping but nowdays i just dun and even i go to my altar i dun pray properly......i wanna be out of all these..my motivation seems to be lost!oh man! i go school also i dun feel like attending lecture and even if i attend my concentration is elsewhere! ARGH! it sucks!onli the god can save me and onli i can save myself! im just too worked up about trivial matters and i think too much about wat people will think of me! and when i try to cheer up someone i get bushed back in return and it sucks! i never had gone thru this kind of a hassle! everytime i see someone lookin at me ..i will be wondering wat the hell are they thinkin about me! i just think too much! but i cant help iT! damN!oh man! god saves me..and this cousin of mine has been in a bad mood for the pass few days!hopefully he is ok by saturday and turns up for the party!i miss:DD and MDMy sec school Friends...the 5B gang with sabby....and also Kert troupie!COUSINS!!!! (1st and 3rd)=)
Walk to my grave along with your heart ♥ 10:56 PM
